Looking for my place & purpose.

It seems that every few months or so I run into an event that poses itself as a major life change.  Recently, these events have reared their heads in the form of potential job loss.  I think I'm looking at it again... this would be the third time in a year... loss by potential employer contract loss, loss by budget cuts, loss by... I really don't know about this one. 

I've been working as an administrative secretary to the president of Oakwood University since January & have been full time since February.  This sounds all great and such, but the kicker in it all is that I've been TEMPORARY  for the entire time.  I even told them upon getting the temp position that the only reason I was even interested was because as a PERMANENT employee of the university, I would qualify for health benefits... But alas, here we are 4 months of full time & overtime & many MANY MANY struggle days later & I'm no closer to my goal of getting health care... Everytime I bring up my status to my "manager" she has nothing to say & a bit later I hear that she has complaints about something. Those somethings often present themselves as her opinions & not things that affect my job performance, ie. I have natural hair, I don't wear suits everyday, etc...

Yesterday, she says "I need to talk to you about employment tomorrow... probably towards the end of the day" & the pessimistic side of me says, "great... you are about to come with some bullsh!t... lemme go on down to HR & see what my movement options are since you want me out of this office."

So, we'll see what happens at the end of this day.  Regardless of what she says, I have a glimmer of hope at a photography job opening that I'll be applying for in the very near future.  I want to get super excited about it because it would be a position IN MY FIELD OF STUDY. I would actually be doing PHOTOJOURNALISM... actually using my degree!

(For anyone who has gone through 4 years of college & worked hard to get a degree, then not use it because the job opportunities just don't exist & end up being a secretary or a cashier or a customer service rep... you know my utter delight at this possibility.)

I'm praying for that job.  I'm praying for guidance & the clarity of mind to realize God's hand moving me.  I'm praying for employment that is FOR me because I want to wake up in the morning happy about it. I want to use my gifts & talents.  I want to see that Red Bull commercial & be like 'yeah, I've got that' instead of crying 'yeahhhh, i wanna wake up with a passionnnnnn tooooooo' (that commercial kills me...)

Going through the process of finding your place & purpose is a hard thing.

So, if anyone reads this, please say a prayer or leave me a prayer.

Busy Bee...

I decided to take a little break from working... I'm waiting for the Admin Asst to return from lunch so I can go get something to eat... I'm so stinkin hungry... arg... Anywho, in other news, I've decided that tomorrow is going to be the launch day for Apt-203! Yay!

What is Apt-203, you ask?

Apt-203 is my new crafting blog. A few months ago, I was flitting between tumblr and blogger looking for crafty blogs run by ladies of color... only to find maybe 3... that don't post often... *sad face*  I was talking to my roommate about it and she gave me that well do it yourself look. You know the one with the raised eyebrow. At first I didn't want to commit to it because I had all these different worries... what if it sucks... what if no one reads it... what if I can't keep up with the consistency... on and on my mind went until I decided that above all my worries, there's surely some other little crafty black girl wondering where are the crafters that look like her.  And so, Apt-203 was born.

---hours later---

 I'm really excited about starting Apt-203 tomorrow. I was planning to write the welcome post tonight so that it would be all ready to go, but alas, I must go to bed. Wish me luck with my new endeavor! Good night all :)

Good Things: 26th Birthday

Yesterday was my 26th birthday, and it was a very pleasant day. Here's my list. :)

• Roses & a birthday card from church coworkers

• Jewelry music box from Lamar
• Raggedy Ann doll from Lamar

• Lots of doggie cuddles :)

• Afternoon naps
• Bones marathon
• Polka-dot wrapping paper

• Crochet works in progress
• Birthday cheesecake made by Lamar
• Reading crafty blogs
• Deep conditioning
• Craft project planning
• Gifted bags from strangers (This girl came in the office Wednesday & I told her I liked her bag. She thanked me & said that when she gets a new one I can have it. I thought she was just being nice, but today she came in & gave it to me ^.^ How nice!)
  

Ugh... Just Ugh...

I am currently at work and very frustrated because I am sorting through incomplete travel reports... nearly a year and a half of them... Why is this frustrating? Because not only am I adjusting to a new work environment, I have to finish the work that the last person didn't. So I'm getting further & further behind while trying to tie up the ends left before me... Why am I blogging right now?  Frankly, if I don't give my brain a break from this foolishness, I'm going to kick some stuff over!!!

I feel a tiny bit better right now...