Ok... another work rant...

It's half an hour til lunch and I'm about to kirk out... I mean I'm here in this accounts payable office in the accounting department trying to make sense of what I'm suppose to be doing.  Now, I'd just like to say:

I am by NO MEANS an accountant!

Now that I've gotten that off of my chest... who am I kidding... I don't really feel any better... I know that I can do the work. I can submit the invoices and keep things in order... it's all very repetitive, but the kicker is that everything I'm doing right now, I pretty much learned within the last few days.  I've only been working here for about 2 weeks and I swear the people in the other departments think that the last lady actually trained me to take over her work.  When in all actuality, she pretty much bounced.  Left family photos and silverware in her desk drawer and everything... So no, I received NO TRAINING and I DONT KNOW what she was doing with all the accounts before she left... I am flying by the seat of my pants here and scrambling to pick up bits and pieces of information and details that ALWAYS turn out to be CRUCIAL to whatever case I'm working on...

[breathe caleisha breathe]

It seems that getting out of one office where I "wasn't the right fit" dropped me right into another office where I'm totally outside of my knowledge base... I know stretching oneself is good, but this has got to be the extreme view of that idea.

...This is rough...

The search for place & purpose continues...

Here are my last few days in a nutshell: we are moving you to another office because you're not the right fit for this one. Your work is awesome though, so don't be upset. We want to keep you in our system, just somewhere else.

June 30th will be my last day working as an admin secretary in the pres office at Oakwood. There are other openings on campus that have been notified of my "work awesomeness" but truly speaking, I'm having a hard time feeling solidly positive.  I know that, really really, I should've quit this office like a month ago because working with the admin assistant is like pulling teeth while explaining grammar to a chihuahua... But hey, now I won't have to work with her anymore.

The Social Media Specialist/Photographic Services position in PR opened up yesterday.  It's a glimmer of hope for me.  I spoke about the opening with one of the ladies in HR that has been really supportive throughout my whole President's Office struggle, and she said that many times God has to allow us to work through something to get to His better plan for us.  She also said that He often gives us hints that maybe where you are is not where you should be & if we miss those hints He may have to move us by other means... My mom says things like that to me all the time.  She says she & I are "run into the brick wall then try everything to get around it kind of women..."  So more than I'd like to think, God has had to remove me from situations when I was hellbent on making it work.

Come the first of July, I'll be in another office... not sure where & that makes me anxious, but I know that wherever it is- it'll be TONS better than my current environment.

So my search for place & purpose continues... 

I found myself getting rather frustrated with the fact that I don’t know what I’m “suppose” to be doing professionally.  I’m currently a secretary at Oakwood University, but that doesn’t give me the kind of environment that I’d really flourish in.  Sure I’m learning a lot about how the organization works & how to do requisitions & book trips & such, but there is no creativity… no color…

I’ve gotten into wearing these long skirts to work.  Some of them are bright colored or floral printed. I like how they make me feel when I look at them.  I just found out today that how I’ve been dressing (for like 2 months) is not how they’d like me to dress… I sort of feel like I’m overreacting to this, but I feel so choked by this recent development.  I don’t want to wear suits all the time.  Or blouses or heels… I don’t want to wear black, blue, and tan… I don’t want to be stuffy. I just want to wear my skirts & be nice to people & do the job at hand…

Anyway, I digress from the initial point of this post… the frustration of not knowing what I’m “suppose” to be doing.  I never was that kid that decided on a career & followed it all the way through college. I went through so many occupations while in school… oceanographer, teacher, artist, novelist, editor, columnist, veterinarian, art director, interior designer, architect, layout designer, photographer, etc… Both of my parents regularly remark at the amount of skills I have & how I can do so many things… and that leaves me feeling like ‘being able to do so many things & doing one thing are completely different…’

I just want to know my purpose…

I just want to create… I just want to be moved & satisfied by my occupation.

I want to know I’m doing the right thing.

The right thing for my life right now.

Hump Day

It seems that I'm getting more & more annoyed with being at work today... I'm trying to be productive & get all these tasks done, but as soon as I start making headway on one thing 2 more jump on the list... le'sigh... It's really a shame that I want to take a break already & I've only been here for an hour 15 mins. 

So I'm taking a secret blogging break. The kind where whenever the powers that be come back into the office I hit that good ol' -alt/tab- to pretend that I've been working on this travel itinerary all along. *shrug*

I decided to do the 'photo an hour' today. The biggest challenge I foresee is not having 7 pictures of my desk or computer... oh and I'm going to try not to be frustrated at the fact that I can't seem to EVER upload a photo from my phone in this office!!! grrr... oh well.

Speaking of uploading photos... I just got instagram on my phone a few days ago ::cheers from the android market:: I'm using it as inspiration to photograph more. I am slowly finding users to follow & one of them is Meredith of OneSheepishGirl. (check out her blog, it's lovely) Today she yarn bombed her desk in her media class & it has totally inspired me to actually do it. I've been wanting to yarn bomb something but never really put much thought into it. But now, I've decided to bomb my favorite OU bench. (there use to be the most awesome tree next to it, but sadly it was cut down...) I'm going to bomb my bench ^.^ There will be pictures of this endeavor!

I feel so much better now :)

Ugh... Just Ugh...

I am currently at work and very frustrated because I am sorting through incomplete travel reports... nearly a year and a half of them... Why is this frustrating? Because not only am I adjusting to a new work environment, I have to finish the work that the last person didn't. So I'm getting further & further behind while trying to tie up the ends left before me... Why am I blogging right now?  Frankly, if I don't give my brain a break from this foolishness, I'm going to kick some stuff over!!!

I feel a tiny bit better right now...